Little Victories

Today was a hard day.

Work is a little difficult; because of some staffing issues, I currently have to work completely out of my job description to help my team out.  I have to move in just under four weeks and I have no idea where I am moving yet.  And it's not like I am being indecisive, I truly have no options right now.  I am feeling stressed.  Stressed to the point of almost bursting into tears in the middle of my office when I hung up with an affordable apartment complex that has no vacancies.

In my "old life," I would have probably run home and poured a glass of wine, or maybe cracked open a beer.  Maybe had a big meal with some ice cream.  It would have felt pretty good, honestly. But.  But, obviously it was  unhealthy and it clearly got me nowhere good.

Today, all I wanted to do when I got home was work out.  And it felt really really good.

"And I'll be awful sometimes
Weakened to my knees
But I learned to get by
On the little victories."
from Matt Nathanson's "Little Victories"

I want to be an athlete again.

I have always identified myself as an athlete.  As long as I don't have to run, I excel at sports.  Even when overweight, I could kick ass at kickball and volleyball, especially.

Before I became overweight, I was a competitive high school athlete.  I played soccer for twelve years and volleyball for six.  I am going to be honest: I really, really miss competing on that level.  One of my big, intangible goals is to be an athlete again.  I am not yet quite sure what this looks like for me, but I guess that is what makes it intangible.

I do know the first step, though, even if the rest of the path is not visible: get moving.

So how does one do this when you are so out of shape that you have anxiety about going to the gym?

Hypothetically speaking, of course.

I am by no means an expert.  If I was an expert on this, this blog would not exist, right?  I can only say what has worked for me over the last month.  So far, I have rocked the Wii Fit.  I also have tried to go to my apartment complex gym during off times so I can avoid other folks until I feel more comfortable.  Lastly, I have driven over to my parents' neighborhood, parked there and walked the two mile loop there (walking the streets where I live is not feasible because I live smack between to major highways).

Dinners That Work For Me

I am single.  I live alone.  In a lot of ways, during weight loss, these two facts are huge advantages.  I have no one else to cook for, no one else's (unhealthy) food is in my refrigerator or kitchen and I can eat indulge my weird eating patterns without judgment, haha.    There are, of course, disadvantages to living alone when dieting.  My most prevalent issue is that most recipes prepare several servings of the dish and the leftovers can either get old or go bad.

My solution?  Freeze.

For the most part, I have no problems eating the same dish over and over, as long as the food does not go bad.  So I love to make recipes that make ten or more serving of the dish.  That way I can freeze five or six servings and put the other half of the dish in storage containers in the fridge.  On a crazy morning, I can grab one of the containers from the fridge and throw it in my lunchbox for work.  The frozen leftovers are perfect for nights that I know will be busy.  I can grab one of the servings out of the freezer, put it in the fridge in the morning and have ready to thawed, ready to heat leftovers ready when I get home.

Weight Watchers has a great feature, the Recipe of the Day.  I have found the following two freezable recipes using that feature.  And they are awesome.  I will admit that I doctor both of them.

Three Bean and Pork Chili
and
Layered Mexican Chicken

The photo above is the Layered Mexican Chicken.  I doctored it by adding one chopped onion and about a table spoon of minced garlic.  I am going to be honest, I'll add garlic to just about anything.

I doctor the chili by doubling the jalapeños (duh, I am from Texas) and throwing in one more clove of garlic (obviously a given).

Both of these dishes are healthy and hearty.  I hope you enjoy them!

Something to work for

Why I am on this journey?

Let me start from the beginning... on May 14, 2010, I joined Weight Watchers for my best friend's thirtieth birthday.  I did it on a whim, but for some reason it just clicked for me.  I think it was just time.

Since then, I lost 63 pounds, gained 15 pounds back and am now back on track.  I think now is a great time to examine the original reasons I decided to stick with the program and then maybe set some new goals...

Original Goals:
Lose 10% of my body weight completed 7/2010
Lose 20% of my body weight completed 1/2011 and then again in 8/2011 after gaining 15 lbs back
Be able to shop at normal, non plus-sized clothing stores  completed 9/2010
Start exercising

New Goals:
Quit smoking cigarettes completed 5/2011
Maintain regular exercise routine completed 8/2011
Train and run a 5K- in progress, currently doing walk/jog combo on most days
Lose 30% of my body weight - in progress
Lose 40% of my body weight- long term goal

I would ask you to check in with me, see how I am doing.  The only way I got this far was through accountability and support and I will continue to need it along the way!